As we all know, the Baker Boys (a.k.a Landon & Gavin) arrived three weeks ago on June 27th. Where have those last three weeks gone?? I feel like time was standing still before they arrived and now? Now, I feel as if time is flying by and I'm missing so much.
One night/morning (seriously, who has any sense of time with newborns?), while Kevin and I were feeding the boys, they were making the funniest faces. This was the first week they were home and we were still in that phase where everything is new and you're so excited that you aren't tired...yet. We were laughing at how cute they were and Kevin mentioned how sad it made him that someday we'll forget that moment. I wish time could have stopped right then. We were in our perfect little bubble, me and my three guys. I decided to start blogging again, just so I will have a spot to write down all of those perfect little moments, no matter how few and far between they are.
So, here we are three weeks later and I feel as if Kevin and I have forgotten that little moment. We're both walking zombies. Kevin has went back to work and is struggling with nighttime feedings. We're both so tired that we're falling asleep sitting up. As soon as we close our eyes at night, one of them decides they're hungry and needs attention. At first, I tried to take on more of it than he did because I know he's the one working now and he needs sleep. But, it's getting hard on me and I've decided he needs to do his share, as well.
And me? I'm still healing and still in quite a bit of pain. Parts of my legs are still numb from pushing so hard with them and I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever get that feeling back. And I'm exhausted. Like I said, I'm a walking zombie. Our first two weeks home, we had company every. single. day. We kept saying we were going to block out a day for no visitors and every time, someone asked to come by. Finally, on a Thursday after we'd been home for a week, we finally said no. Both boys had been up until at least 7 a.m. screaming their little heads off. We aren't sure if it was their bellies or what, but we were miserable. They finally fell asleep on my chest and across my lap and I got a few snoozes in, as well. If I had known how fast those two weeks would have went by, I would have definitely put my foot down more. We didn't have anytime as a family to really bond and spend those precious few days together. When Kevin went back to work, we only had two days alone with the boys and it makes me feel awful. So, ladies, don't be afraid to say no to visitors.
We haven't had any visitors since the Wednesday before our melt down and I've loved it. I've had time to relax and not worry about having to get dressed or have my shower before a certain time. My boys don't care if I stay in my pjs all day w/ no make up and no shower until bed time. They still cuddle up to me, regardless. I am ready to get out of this apartment though. We're hoping to go on an outing, just the four of us, this weekend. Maybe to the park or something to test out the stroller.
But, I just have to say. Words cannot even begin to express how unbelievably in love I am with these babies. I just sit and look at them and cannot believe that I made them. That I carried them in my belly for 9 months and gave them life. Kevin always says that he can't believe he had a hand in making something so perfect and that describes how I feel perfectly. I cannot wait to see them learn and grow into little men, but it's okay with me if time decides to slow down a bit. I know that I'll miss these days, as crazy as that sounds!
Well, it's feeding time, so that's all for now! I'll update with their birth story later! :)
Until then, here's a picture of my little monkeys from the night they were born. Landon is the one with his eyes wide open!